Wet Dog Wine, anyone?

T Fox: Why is it always so that I have an idea and if I don't write it down as soon as I can, it disappears somewhere?
Mr Fox: Write up, not down, you're speaking Finglish.

Yep, why is it so? Why do you write something down and we write it up?

Actually that wasn't the topic for this post, but as I said it disappeared, almost like my entire day, which I spent by cleaning up, really properly. Whilst doing it I drank some wine, which was nice, but eventually I got so tipsy I messed everything up and missed the only fantastic happening this week, because I had to take a nap. Buggeringly enough I even got a ticket for this: Drawing Restraint 9. Well, I missed the Turing Machine Opera as well, but never mind, I've got tickets to Horton for tomorrow. Yay!

Actually now when I am here I might ask you a question as well. It troubled me when I was drinking that wine, which was something flowery Riesling from Alsace area: smooth, mellow and pleasantly round. What is the term for that wine character, the feeling when you have swallowed the wine and your mouth is filled with almost an oily or buttery aftertaste? No, not a taste, but a feeling. Anyone?

I tried to find it out, but found this clever wine aroma wheel instead.



Hmm.... I don't know how to use that exactly. Well, you could always play some kind of wheel of fortune game with that thing. After spinning the wheel you have to drink that kind of wine. Glass of skunk wine, here you are. Mmmm...

It was a dark and stormy night

Few weeks ago, when it was a dark night, but without the northern November sea wind (like we had yesterday), I was walking outside with the dog. I passed familiar places and tried to think what to write about, but I felt bit down and forgotten, as I tend to do when autumn is nearly over and everything, even the nature, is desperately bare. I was thinking how lovely it was, just a month ago, to sit in shadow and enjoy cold Italian prosecco with the friends, playing the "which animal would you be" game.

Could that be a sensible topic, perhaps a new meme, I thought, but after a second thought I believed no-one would love to read this kind of dialogue:
Colleague 1: Let's play the "which animal would you be"-game.
T Fox: Ok. What animal would I be?
Collegues 1 & 2 & 3: A sebra.
T Fox: A sebra? What about if I'd be something not so scared and stripey. Some carnivore?
Collegues 1 & 2 & 3: A wolverine.
T Fox: Hmm...
Colleague 2: If you would be a car you'd be a really old Mercedes-Benz.
T Fox: Hey, that's not an animal!
Colleague 1: Would you be a cat or a dog?
T Fox: A cat.
Colleague 1: No, you would be a dog.
Colleagues 2 & 3: Definitely a dog.
T Fox: Ok, I admit. What kind of dog I'd be then? I'd like to be an Irish Setter.
Colleague 2: A pug.
Colleague 3: Are we ready to go now?

I was ready to go and plucked the dog back from the bush. Crappy idea, I thought and wondered how many ah-so-brilliant ideas I had had, but couldn't have written about them, because so much or nearly everything would have got lost in the translation.

Two about 12-year-old boys were standing on the top of the hill with their bikes.
We came closer.
Boy 1: "Noutaja" comes.
[Unauthorized translator: noutaja s 1 retriever kultainen noutaja golden retriever]
T Fox: [not aloud] Retriever? Don't they teach anything at school these days?
We come closer.
Boy 1: Didn't you hear? "Noutaja" comes.
T Fox: [not aloud] Yes, yes, I heard, are you stupid or something?
We come closer.
Boy 1: Now I'm starting to be scared. Do you want to have a taste of my knife?
T Fox: [not aloud] Shit!
[Unauthorized translator: noutaja s 2 Grim Reaper]

I think my dog looks too nice to be nearly a wolf. Should I get her a creepy outfit?

Jack Sparrow Dog Costume and many more here

On the Menu Today

The language of the Fox blog has changed into Finnish during the night. Where it used to read title, it now says otsikko, where it said view blog it now reads tarkastele blogia and label is suddenly luokkatunniste. The whole blog is like a messy room, where every object has changed it's place at once. I feel like I've lost my ability to control my own blog and seems like I have trouble in understanding my own language as well.
I feel myself bit dim.
I think I have to go and buy the Dim Body Toutch Bra I saw advertised yesterday.



No. Probably having a new horrible looking bra wouldn't help me writing something more meaningful, so I will just copy-paste some dishes seen on some Finnish menus.

Shrimp and crap salad for two.

Grilled pork shop.

You can have crap on your pizza.

We give you water only when you ask.

Dead snails from Åland in garlic and butter sauce.

The cock is recommending today's beef.

We can serve your steak with much blood, some blood, or well-done.

Ice cream with warm bear halves and toffee sauce.

Finnish mushroom salad - wild, salty and sticky mushrooms with cream sauce and pickles.

Mexican burrito with mutilated chicken meat and salsa.

Try traditional Finnish pee soup.

We can bring the nuts and drinks to your room (room service card). Drink something if you want (room service card). On our breakfast table you will find the cheese, the meat and some others.

Omelet is made with recent eggs from a local farm where the chickens are alive.

This week is "bird meat week" but we also have a good selection of mammal meat.

Japanese guests can have traditional breakfast with stinky rice and fishes.

Tar ice cream - Finnish special. Good for people who eat tar and lingon berries.

Children's hamburger is served with the French Pizzas. After clock 21 are not. Sorry.

Meat with sweat and sour sauce.

The Kuril-Kamchatka Trench in the Internet, where I was

So, I visited You Tube trying to see Loituma video. I found it, but what an earth was that supposed to be, I wondered. A girl with a leek? I wasn't the only one pondering what was this chick doing with that a huge onion? A flashmob with leeks? I soon found out why there was a leek, although it still was a mystery to me. As big as my surprise when I realised how had this odd Finnish song spread through the Internet.

Do we really need any song contests at all? Why not just look at a Mexican guy singing pefectly spelled Finnish? Japanese man with a guitar? Holly Dolly? A Dane with a tuba? Why not to learn how to play it with keyboard? Hungarian politicians? Pygmies dancing Loituma? Italians dancing? Russian making some wonder is this how grunge died? El mundo es de los frikis?
Buli az asztalosnal? Jim Carrey? Greek soap? I've seen this man in this blog, but never heard this with a flute. How did the name suddenly turn into Yak Tsup Tsop? And finally something * which made him to seek a bottle and me to seek for the big red button.



*this is particularly for you Opc

Ps. Do you want to know what the words really mean? Look at the comments.

Mother Tongue

It's warm, sunny and shiny outside, but I'm scuba diving in the muddy waters.
Whilst I'm there, learn some Finnish.

The longest word in the world

epäjärjestelmällistymättömyydellänsäkäänköhän

What does it mean, isn't that clear.
Wonder if he can also do something with his capability of not being disorganized?
Anyway, something to do with being not confused, I think, but it's bit too confusing.

pientalokolmivaihevaihtovirtakilowattituntimittarimaksu

If you find that word from your electricity bill, just pay the damn bill.

lentokonesuihkuturbiinimoottoriapumekaanikkoaliupseerioppilas

If somebody calls you that, you are apparently a student and later in your life you will fix the airplane engines or something.





Some place names somewhere in Finland

Äteritsiputeritsipuolilaudatsijänkä
Nobody knows what it means, but Santa lives quite near.

Semmonen niemi jossa käärme koiraa pisti
Translated as: That kind of cape where the snake bit the dog.

Lehmänjalkakatkesiaho
Translated as Cow's-leg-went-broken-glade.

Grammar is fun

Verb          Meaning
tehdä         to do
teettää       to have someone do
teetättää     to have someone have someone do
teetätättää   to have someone have someone have someone do

Finglish for Nyypiös

Pirskatti, uus heerkatti!

The sentence above, written in somewhat old Finglish, means something like: Crickey, a new haircut! Old Finglish originated amongst the first and second generation Finnish immigrants in USA and Canada, but today's Finnish is more or less filled with these words of New Finglish. Although it is suggested that Finnish is particularly tricky language to learn, it might be now easier for you native English speakers. I leave you to speculate it with this homework. Kamoon, fill in the missing translations, it is completely iisii.

nyypiö = a newbie
tsekata = to check (out)*
staili = a style*
streitti = straight / heterosexual*
biitsi = a beach **
giiggi = a ?
kreisi = crazy*
steissi = a ?
räppi = a rap**
vörkkiä = to work (out)*
klikata = to click *
hevijuuseri = a heavy-user *
hengata = to hang out ***
seivata = to save *

Edit:
Foxvision Translation Contest official glory points:
* 12 Points to BiB
** 10 Points to Anonymous
*** 8 points to Marsha Klein