For nearly two weeks now, the black clouds have been shadowing my path. I have been travelling, I have been working hard, I have been drinking wine, I have been in a party, I have been looking at art, all under a heavy sky. I think I don't know anything. I think I am not told anything. I have sent my kids to a new school and a new day-care, I have organized parties, shown them interesting places, taken them to a movie audition. I asked them what they have thought about it all. J (6) answered: "I'm just thinking if there is a black hole, at what point you can still turn back before it sucks you in?" Today it was yet another storm. After it I ran to the hill with the dog and sat down. I looked at the dark sky. All those stars. All those millions of people around me, telling me nothing. Sitting there, on the top of the quiet hill, I have never felt myself so alone.